China
Guatemala
Russia
Vietnam
Brazil
India
EthiopiaShe began as a possibility, then a dream, then a prayer. She became a blessing of love beyond description.
My husband, Mike, and I had been blessed with two sons, Neil and Max, in 1991 and 1994. Early in our marriage we had planned to have only two children. We decided to have another one. After trying for two years, the possibility on international adoption came up. God began opening doors.
Our journey began with a call to Keith Wallace, director of Families Thru International Adoption (FTIA).
He answered our questions and seemed very driven. By January 1998, God had let
both Mike and I know that adopting a child was the right thing to do. We met
with Keith and discovered that FTIA was just beginning adoptions in Vietnam. We
both felt that Vietnam was right for us. We mailed our application to FTIA on
January 20, 1998.
And so the paperwork began. I wanted everything done as soon as possible and made sure it was. By the first week of March, the paperwork was completed and our dossier was delivered to the agency. Now we just had to wait. Keith said the next baby girl brought into the orphanage would be ours. We had no idea how long that might take. I just knew that a child would be sent to us from God. I had been praying about it daily.
As we waited, I would often say to Mike, "Today might be the day our baby is born." I wondered if I would know what I had been doing on the day of her birth. On April 2,1998, we received the call. A baby girl had been taken to the orphanage. Our baby girl. She was born on February 5, 1998. That was all Keith knew. A packet of information should be coming soon. He said we would travel in July.
We had a girl! I called Mike to tell him the news. Then I called everyone else I could think of! It was not until I was writing it on the calendar that I realized she was born two days after my father died. I knew what I had been doing on the day she was born. I was at the funeral home. My father had been so excited about our adoption plans. I knew that the Lord meant for us to have this child. He took my father and gave us a daughter. We would later decide to name her after my dad. Since our first pregnancy, we had the name Rachel chosen for a girl. My father's name was Ruby. Her birth mother gave her the name Nam. She would be called Rachel Ruby Nam.
When her information came, it contained an "affidavit" written by her mother explaining why she was giving her up, a birth certificate, a medical examination report, and a few other orphanage documents. There was no picture. Her mother had separated from her husband four years earlier. She and her one-year-old daughter moved in with her parents. She was a farmer. Farmers in Vietnam work very hard and are extremely poor. She could not afford to raise two children. She listed the father as unknown. She had kept Rachel for one month, which is probably how long she could stay out of the fields. I cannot imagine not knowing if I would have enough food to feed my children. My heart aches for her. It must have been so hard to give her up. And hard on her big sister too. What great love she must have in her heart to be able to do this. Often, my prayers were for her. I pray for her still.
Soon, Rachel's picture arrived. I went to the agency to pick it up and told them to make sure it was in an envelope. Although I could hardly wait, I didn't want to look at it until Mike was with me. I wanted us to see her for the first time together. I didn't know what to expect, because I didn't know what Vietnamese babies looked like. We set up the video camera so that some day she can watch us getting our first glimpse of her. We all sat on the couch and I took the photo out of the envelope. I could not believe my eyes. She was so beautiful! I examined every detail of that picture. We could not tell how big she was, because she was laying on a straw mat and there was nothing else in the picture to compare her size to. Nor did we know when the picture had been taken. But we knew that we had a baby girl, and she was beautiful. She was real.
Our departure date was set for July 22. Initially, we were told we would not be traveling with anyone else to Vietnam, but later discovered that there would be five other couples and one single going with us. It was an unusually large group for Rose Marie, the coordinator in Vietnam, but it was comforting to know there would be others with us.
With the boys safe with their aunt and uncle, we were ready to embark on our two week adventure. It had been difficult to pack "lightly" when taking clothes, diapers, bottles and a virtual pharmacy for a baby. The excitement was overwhelming. Soon our baby would be in our arms. It took us thirty-six hours to get to Vietnam. It was a long flight, but I used to that time to write in a journal for Rachel. I wanted her to know every detail of how God sent her to us and how much we loved her.
We finally met Rose Marie in person at the airport in Bangkok, our last stop before Vietnam. She was very nice and extremely helpful. We had lots of questions, and she answered all of them. She was not certain when we get the children, because her staff was still working on getting a required signature from a Vietnamese official for two of the children. She assured us they were working very diligently on it.
Vietnam was unlike anything we had ever experienced. It was extremely hot, and most places did not have air conditioning. The traffic consisted mostly of bicycles. There were also motorcycles and cycloes (three-wheeled bikes with a seat on the front for a passenger - a Vietnamese "taxi"). There were very few automobiles. The very strange part was there were no traffic signs. People just went! Our main mode of transportation would be cyclo. It seemed frightening at first, but they all seem to know how to maneuver around each other. Each person's assigned cyclo driver was available to him whenever he needed him - night or day.
We did a little sight-seeing before getting the children. The people of Vietnam were so friendly and work very hard. When they serve you, they really want to please you. Before going, I was afraid of being robbed, because they are so poor and know Americans are not. But we felt really safe and could even leave our valuables in the hotel room. They are also very family-oriented. It was not unusual to see a father, mother, and two children riding on one motorcycle. They have so little and seem take pride in everything. It was a beautiful country.
We finally got our children. They were brought to the hotel, because it was Sunday and the giving and receiving ceremony could not be held until Monday. Rachel was sound asleep when they brought her to us. She had just had a one hour van ride from the orphanage in Bac Ninh to our hotel in Hanoi. She looked absolutely angelic. I held her in my arms and touched her face. She did not wake. I would say it was love at first sight, but the love had started long before we saw her. She was more beautiful in person than in any of the pictures. At 5 1/2 months old, she was so tiny! A few minutes after I handed her to Mike, she woke up. She just looked us over real well - no crying. I don't think any of the children cried. At their orphanage, each care-giver took care of only two children. They were obviously well-cared for.
After seeing everyone else's children, we took her to our room and fed and bathed her. We had been told by Rose Marie's assistants that she was "very good baby" and they said she sleeps through the night. After the first two nights, we found that to be true. She smiled, but not readily. We had to work for them. She was wonderful. It felt as though she had already been a part of us for a long time. Having that time to bond with her without the distraction of our other children was very special.
We took a van to the orphanage before our giving and receiving ceremony. We were ushered into a new building, paid for by FTIA, that they had moved into only the week before. The old building stood nearby and looked very dilapidated. It was boarded up. That is where Rachel had spent most of her four previous months. We went to a large room with a long table and drank green tea with the director of the orphanage and his assistant. Then we had to quickly go to the Justice Department for the ceremony. After waiting for hours in a small building in extreme heat, the officials arrived and the ceremony took place. When our names were called, we went forward and signed our names on about six documents. She was legally our daughter! No one could take her away from us.
After a very long day, we did not have time to go back and visit the orphanage. I really wanted to see more of the orphanage and meet Rachel's care-givers. So when two other families went for their ceremony, Rachel and I went along to stay at the orphanage and be picked up later. Another couple and their baby also went. There was no one else at the orphanage who spoke English. Because they came and made a big fuss over her, I realized who Rachel's care-givers were. They held her the whole time we were there. I could tell they loved and missed her. They pointed out which bed had been hers. It was a full size wooden bed with no mattress - just a straw mat. There were no cribs. Each room had two or three beds, an old chest and a fan. The fans had just been purchased by FTIA. That summer had been particularly hot, and many people had died. There were no toys or "stuff" like we have in America. There were some children there but not many as Rose Marie had been very busy working many adoptions. I watched as one caregiver fed two babies with the same bottle - going back and forth between the two as a two year-old stood by wearing nothing but a tee shirt. It was hard for me to believe that only a few days before, Rachel had been one of the children living here.
Back in Hanoi, we did more sightseeing with Rachel in tow. The Vietnamese people always gave us a thumbs up sign. Those who could speak English told us she was very lucky. We did not see any resentment that we were taking her from her homeland.
Vietnam was a wonderful place to visit, and we hope to go back someday. If someone were to offer me a one week vacation to anywhere, I would choose Vietnam. But it was so great to finally get Rachel home. She is loved by everyone. Both of her brothers adore her. At church, she gets passed around by everyone. She gets lots of attention wherever we go and loves it. She really studies people and is quick to smile now. We are all so happy.
People don't usually ask, but occasionally someone will ask where we adopted her from and usually, for just a moment before I answer, I think, "How did he know she was adopted?" We love Rachel just as much as we love our biological children. None of them are really ours anyway. All children are a gift from God sent to us to raise. He just sends some in different ways from others. We are so very thankful He chose to send our third child through a very strong woman with a big heart in Vietnam.
Mike & Cindy
Indiana
812-475-2870
